Newsletter #89
October 26, 2007


The Web's Only Peer-Reviewed Panama Newsletter
#89 Important Date, Not in Kansas

Most Important Day of the Year

I'm writing this on October 26, and today makes 31 years Nora and I have been married. I still wonder every day, how I managed to get so much the better part of a deal. If you see her or talk with her, please congratulate her on her enduring patience and tolerance.

We're Not in Kansas Anymore

One recurring theme among newcomers to Panama is the idea that “This is the way things should be, and I'm going to raise hell about it not being that way”. It's a phase most of us expats go through, and we either get over it or we go nuts and eventually leave. The way things “should be” most often bears not even a faint resemblance to the way things are, and there is nothing we can do about it. Case in point; For several years there has been a more or less established procedure for arranging for an after-hours vet on standby at the airport. By following this procedure, which involves a modicum of preparation of paperwork and an off-the-books payment to the vet, folks arriving after official working hours could spare their pets an overnight stay at the airport.

That procedure is not codified in law, or written into policy. It provides, for the vets, what is known locally as a “cameron” (shrimp), or bonus income. It works best if you also hire a local expediter who knows all the ins and outs. Those little details are what can drive you stark raving bonkers in Panama, because they seem to change with the weather, the massiveness of traffic jams, or the severity of the hangover whichever clerk you are talking to is experiencing. That's why the expediter can be so important.

OK, any system which is so flexible is bound to suffer a kink now and then. Somebody forgets to deliver a message. The vet stops at a bar to have a drink and meets up with an old flame. The flight is 3 hours late. The opportunities for a screw-up are almost endless. Whatever, something goes wrong and the vet isn't there when Mr and Ms Newexpat arrive with Lassie. They've arrived in Paradise after 60 years of living in a country where the rules are clearly defined, and recourse is available when the rules are violated. So, quite naturally, one or both decide to complain to the vet's boss. Never mind that the worst case scenario is that one or both of the Newexpats will spend the night in the arrival area so their pet won't be alone, and I understand why folks would do that. One of our friends did, and aside from a less than pleasant night, no one was the worse for wear.

Anyway, someone complained to the vet's boss that he charged them for being there after hours, so now to cover himself, if you want his service after official hours you will have to file a signed letter requesting after-hours service, and stating that you understand you will be charged extra for that service. Before you go getting all indignant about another brick in the wall of bureaucracy, remember that the boss could simply have decreed that from now on, there will be no exceptions to official procedure.

Fortunately, for those who understand and accept the way things are, there are always work-arounds to the nuttiness that comes out of the Legislative Palace in the form of laws. Please, tell your friends not to gum up the works by insisting on following the official rules, and/or filing official complaints. That doesn't mean you shouldn't complain if someone has used their position to rip you off. This is just about the normal, everyday chaos that seems to rule here.

Yahoo Groups – Have they outlived their usefulness?

I placed the following ad in several of the Yahoo Panama groups.

For Sale

1999 Chrysler Stratus for sale - Excellent condition, A/C, automatic, good tires, low mileage, duty paid. $3200.00 OBO. Contact henry@panamaretire.net or call 6641-8422. This car belongs to my daughter in law, who is taking my youngest granddaughter back to Idaho. If I thought they would stay until the car is sold, I wouldn't advertise it. See pictures  at http://www.panamaretire.net/4sale/chrysler/index.html

It was replied to almost immediately on one of the groups with the following post;

This is a  DODGE  not  a  Chrysler,, remember in  buying  a  9 yr  old  car,,,,, a car  that  there are  not  many others like it in  Panama,,,Parts are or  will be soon   difficult  to  get &  also   check  the  www.autotrader.com   for the price this  car is  selling  for in  USA,,,,Please  remember  this  car  was built  for surburban driving  in  USA  not  the  Rough &  Tough  roads of Panama,,,be careful, fellow  members,,,  bill

Bill doesn't know anything about this car, nor does he know me. He apparently doesn't know anything about Panama either, if he believes cars sell for the same price in Panama as in the US. He doesn't know that the Dodge Stratus was sold outside the US as the Chrysler Stratus. He doesn't know that this car was sold new in Panama, not imported from the US. He doesn't know that parts for older US cars are relatively cheap and easy to find in Panama.

It turns out that Bill sells cars for a local importer, and frequents the groups trying to hustle business. In a later post, Bill offers Chevrolet SSR pickups to Panama buyers, indicating that Bill doesn't know diddly about the Panama car market either, where 390 horsepower retro-styled pickup roadsters aren't exactly in high demand.

Bill is apparently not alone, as there seem to be more than a few hucksters trolling the Yahoo Panama groups. Just a couple of years ago, they were an excellent resource for people wanting “from-the-horse's-mouth” information about Panama. Nowadays, you need to sift the advice you get from them with a very fine-mesh sifter.

Quite aside from the folks like Bill, who will attempt to trash someone else's sale in hopes of gaining one himself, there are lots of well-meaning new arrivals who simply don't fully understand that they're not in Kansas anymore. The big topic lately has been getting the new digital driver's license, and almost every day brings a new post advising everyone that 'THIS is what you have to do to get a new license, because I just did it today'. Almost as often the described procedure differs from the procedure described by someone else yesterday. I can't say this often enough, folks; In Panama, today's apple pie may be tomorrow's meadow muffin.


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