RE:  first visit to Panama.  Give yourself enough time to explore the different areas.  My husband and I spent one month our first visit.  We've been down two times since, for nearly one month each time. First visit, we started out in Panama City, (guess most everybody does), then bussed to the Chiriqui Province, rented a car, and explored all over that area.  We also bussed to Bocas, where we'd fantasized about "Caribbean Tropical Heaven" etched into our future.  Then decided - not for us.  Give us the mountains.  A bit of cool breeze and no little critters eating you while you're munching lunch at an outdoor Bocas establishment.  Yeah, I know, Deet.  We were blinded by the tropics and forgot our Deet.  Every time we've returned, we've re-checked all areas, (except for Bocas, in our case), and re-assessed.  We've also discovered other areas as we've become more familiar with the country.  And, yes, we spent lots of time hanging out in Panama City while waiting for our "Visa application" process, and then again rushing down three months later to wait for the "Visa Finalization" process.  But we love Panama City, so there was much diversion, and great food, and people watching, and interacting.  So not so bad.

RE: Crossing the street in Panama City.  It's like a frenzied Matadore dance. Hint, at first wait till all the local workers, i.e. bank workers, shop workers, hotel workers, etc. are taking their lunch breaks.  Watch.  Wait.  Then when they, either in groups, or individually assertain that it's "safe" to cross, just bunch up with them, and most likely you'll make it to the other curb.  If you're from a U.S. state that "demands" pedestrian right-of-way, get over it, like Right Now.  Yer not in Portland anymore..  Think Manhattan on steroids.

Don't mind all the honking cars.  In Panama, well, it's just kind of a symphony of "horn" conversation.  You start interpreting a "hello" honk.  A "Heads up, coming through" tapping series of honks, "you want to ride in my taxi?" honk,  and a "get the (blank) outta my way" series of honks.  Pnamanians love their horns.  Definitely "talk with their cars.  And Panama City's so congested with cars, usually nobody's going more than 25mi per hour, although they do change lanes in a nano-second. Also, never, never, ever try to cross the steet in front of a city bus - "Diablo Rojos".  Can you say, "squished?"

Panama is full of people.  Yes, just like every other place in the world where we humans exist.  So there's "decent" upstanding citizen, "grifters" of all hues and spiels, to "down right criminal", just like everywhere.  So "eyes open" is a good approach, especially when you first arrive and are dazzled and dazed.  We found Panamanians to be a wonderful culturally mixed, gracious vibrant group of people.  Absolutely love them. Had very few "bad"/negative  experiences.  We've got a heck of a lot more crime on a daily basis, here in Portland, OR.  And it's considered a "top" livable city.

It also helps to take at least one "extended learning" class at your local Junior College, or wherever, to at least get a bit of espanol under your tongue.  People really appreciate the effort.  I've taken a lot more, but need emersion to not drive Panamanians crazy with my stumbling, painfully slow search for the right words to communicate.  Interpretive dance works well as a communication skill as well.  Trying to understand their answers in Spanish, well that's a real challenge.  Color me "stupid" is how I often feel.

One little note re: grocery shopping, cause I made this mistake the first time I was in a Supermercado.  When buying produce, do not load your cart and head into the check-out line.  I held up a dozen "patient" but eye rolling local people by presenting one tomato to the check out clerk.  In Panama, you find someone in the "produce" section, who weighs, bags, and prices your vegetable or fruit items.  My face was scarlet by the time someone from produce was called to check-out, ran back to produce, weighed, and packaged my ONE TOMATO, and finally made it back to the cashier.  But, hey, it's all an adventure.  A learning experience.

RE: getting retirement visa, which I assume you are going for, patience, patience.  We finally found an excellent lawyer in Panama City, after a ridiculous series of "non-responders" or high pricers. RE: Real Estate reps, we noticed that one we finally trusted in Panama City had properties and links all over Panama.  Go slow there.  It's easy to buy.  But just try and sell, if you find out that the "Paradise" location you first fell romantically in love with, may not be as paradisical as first envisioned. That's a whole different story.  We've heard the term "buyer's remorse" more than a few times.  Interview locals, fellow expats, and anyone you can.  Get lots of info.  Hang out in an area to get the pulse of it. Check out medical accessibility, i.e., how long to get to the hospital after you accidentally chop your left foot off with that new machete you're using to chop back weeds.  And know that any time you walk into a real estate office, you'll be pounced on and held captive for some time.  But, again, it's all part of the adventure. A trusted lawyer in this realm is also vital.

Read everything you can, online, in books.  Do your homework/research.  We also found both "Lonely Planet" Panama, and, even more so, The Moon Handbook, Panama to be invaluable.

We're in the final stages of our move - which as of now, has taken two years. Got our permanent visas, after jumping through innumerable hoops.  Now we're slogging about back at home trying to unload our belongings, decide whether to sell ,or rent our house, due to the real estate slump, and "getting a loan" crunch on potential buyers. Then we get to go through the final nerve wracking zaniness of getting belongings we're taking with us properly  inventoried, packed, shipped.  And then there's our two cats who are definitely coming with us, whether they like it or not.

All in all, unless you've got a large family to help with every aspect, which we don't - just the two of us.  Or you're really wealthy and can hire everyone else to do everything for you - which we're also not.  Or you're in the military, again "no" for us, you must be very very patient.  Break it all down into sections.  Be prepared for delays.  And try not to lose your friggin' mind and think "have I gone totally delusional with having this idea?" in order to make it through this major journey.

Anyone with short cuts, I welcome your input.. Hope this is helpful, or at least amusing.

Charloe from Portland, Oregon - Panama Bound.

Editor's note: This article was submitted as a post to the mailing list RETIREnPANANA. I emailed Charloe asking permission to reprint it, and she graciously gave it. Thanks Charloe.